Archive for October, 2006
October 24th, 2006
why i’m not married
Quote of the day:
“A successful man is one who can earn more money than his wife can possibly spend. A successful woman is one who can find that man.”
- Anonymous
October 16th, 2006
A couple weeks ago
I went to Europe for nine days. At home I have to cats that I usually let my neighbor
Joel take care of while I’m traveling. Trouble is: either he would also take care of any “excess” drugs and beer or might even forget to feed
Mickey and Dante all together.There this
scafootz that lives in my building that I
banged a couple times. She offered to take care of my cats while I was gone. I figured anything would be better than Joel, so I let her.When I get back, the cats are healthy and happy (unlike myself). I figured I had made the right decision. Two nights later I fell asleep on the couch around midnight and forgot to lock the door. Approximately 2AM, I get woken up by said scafootz:(Shaking me awake) “Hey, have you got any coke?”
“No, goddamn…I’m sleeping!”
I honestly didn’t think I had any weasel dust because I hadn’t partied at all since I’d been home.
“Well wake up!” scafootz persists.
“NO!!”
Then she drops the bomb, “I know you have some, it’s in that drug box next to your bed…”
“How the fuck do you know about a drug box next to my bed?!” I fired back.
I make her leave and then I started thinking about it….from my birthday, someone gave me an eightball and I still had nearly half of another one that I never did before I left, so I checked my “drug box” and (sure enough) they were gone.
I wasn’t really pissed about the drugs. I know how that shit goes…especially with the devils dandruff, but if you are going to do it…DON’T DO ALL OF IT and even if you do REPLACE IT! It wasn’t the drugs that pissed me off. It was the fact that the bitch was going through my drawers, so I decided I had to cut her off completely.
So, a couple nights later I was at Xenii after the Van Halen Party rolling my balls off. She followed me all over the place saying that she just wanted to “talk”.
“Look — I’m rolling my balls off, I’ve had a great night and I don’t want to deal with this shit.” I told her.
She finally went away. Later on that night, she started blowing up my cell phone with text massages… Now this shit is classic:
Her: Why do you insist on breaking my heart?
Me: Cock soup.
Her: Really?
Me: Cock soup 2.
Her: Hope it tastes good. I’m tired of chasing you.
Me: Cockulous Soupulous III (yes, I am fluent in dead languages)
Her: Don’t text me back. Hope u had fun. I was encouraged to keep going by my friends, but I decided to rest my case there. The next day she sent me a bunch of text messages begging for sex. I never responded. That was the cock soup incident.
October 16th, 2006
This past summer I was talking with Lars and Sean from Adultfriendfinder and they we’re telling me: “Man, you’ve done a good job marketing OCCash…you pretty much take anything, stick a black cock in it, and there you’ve got OCCash!” I thought that was pretty funny, but seeing as sticking one black cock in at a time has become predictable…let’s try stuffing some random white scafootz with 4 BLACK COCKS!
Yes, very innovative. I know.
As usual, we have a full arsenal of promo materials which include free hosted galleries, content, rss feeds, and free hosted sites.
OC Cash
October 16th, 2006
Month: August
Program / Per Click / Conversion Ratio
- Reality Cash / .11 / 1:272
- Sex Search / .06 / 1:500
- AEBN / .06 / 1:10
- OXCash / .05 / .724
- Bangbrosonline / .05 / 1:899
- Intensecash / .04 / 1:574
- Pimproll / .04 / 1:942
- Topbuck / .03 / 1:1580
- Platinumbucks .03 / 1:1069
- Nastydollars / .03 / 1:1474
Top Money Makers (with traffic rank)
- Topbucks
- Trafficcashgold
- nastydollars
- bangbrosonline
- occash
- meatcash
- skintraffic
- realitycash
- naughy america
- adult friend finder
October 5th, 2006
Angelo from Fishbone, Eddie Van Halen, and my boy Matt (Outkast)My boy Ahn from
Wantedlist first told me about the Eddie Van Halen party a few weeks ago. I was skeptical…”lThis just one of those Hollywood things that Eddie is just gonna put his name on and not even be there?”
I hear back, “Nope, he’ll be there…it’s at his house…”
“You’re sure he will be there?” I asked again.
“Yep, it’s his party.”
My boy
Matt (Eddie was actually #1 on “Who I’d Like To Meet” myspace) was in town from Atlanta (you can scratch one off dood), I had a feeling the party could be lame, so made backup plans just in case. I didn’t believe it till (5 minutes after walking in) I was standing six feet away from Eddie in his living room. He was three sheets to the wind (ok, make that 97 sheets), shirtless with his guitar strapped on already. Just by the look on his face: the guy is obviously completely twisted.
Billy Idol was supposed to play that night, but fortunately for us:
he canceled!
Next thing I know, Eddie is on stage whaling out a 20+ minute of “Eruption” that contained some crazy volume knob swell / feedback passages that had even some of the guys on stage scratching their head. After that, the band busted into a Billy Idol song Eddie clearly didn’t even bother learn (so he just soloed over the whole thing).
Fucking brilliant. I loved it.
After that, he busted out 5 or six old Van Halen songs and got offstage. After his set, he ran around his lawn like a maniac, talking to different groups of people, and then darting off to the next suddenly while still clutching his guitar. They guy reminded me a cartoon character or sometthing.
You have probably whacked it to every one of these ladies.Other highlights: (my new best friend) gives me 3 hits of E (and drops nearly 20 on the ground), I roll ass off, puke in Eddie’s plants, partying with Eddie and Angelo from Fishbone, about 10 zillion hot sluts everywhere, a bar that refused to go dry.
You didn’t ever have to look hard to see shenanigans like this happening somewhere!I don’t really give a fuck about celebrities…but, this is Eddie Van Halen.
(Photo: Gia Jordan) Researchers have long speculated that Eddie Van Halen has the musical aptitude that only
a few human beings have ever possessed (including Mozart and Beethoven)…
fuck the research, all you need it this picture to see that!
Eddie Van Hanen, son!!!
Perhaps the most influential guitarist ever.
There are two types of guitar players:
1. Pre-Van Halen
2. Post Van Halen
For years, the best guitar players were considered Eric Clapton and Jimmy Page, with people like Ritchie Blackmoore barely pushing the envelope. Then, in 1978, Eddie Van Halen comes out and sends every six-string-wannabe back to their momma’s basement to practice harder. Here it is almost 30 years later and the guy (despite a nasty bout with cancer) is still getting twacked, drunk, smokes, and hang out with sluts!
It’s good to see cancer hasn’t slowed him down any!
“This thing is really hard to play after you’ve done your 2nd ounce of blow!”After that, we hit Xenii and partied on the roof till dawn.
It’s going to be hard to top that night.
October 3rd, 2006
Los Angeles -
OCCash has acquired affiliate program
Freshchecks.com. Freshchecks has now become an OCCash company. OCCash will assume day to day operations. Current Freshchecks affiliates do not need to sign up again or change you linkcodes. Payments to affiliates will not be interrupted and integration will be seamless.When I saw Freshchecks, I noticed a lot of the same qualities that OCCash had early on: Great looking websites with awesome content. The Freshchecks guys were predominantly from the video production side, are not so much web guys, and are good friends. They gave it a whirl for a few months, but couldn’t really get it cranking to the level we believe potential we believe Freshchecks has. Under the direction of OCCash we plan to grow Freshchecks into a much larger program.Freshchecks has huge potential with its exclusive niche / ethnic based content that surfers love and a perfect match for the types of sites we’ve already have been marketing.We currently have 2 new sites in beta and will leave your surfers roughing up the suspect while simultaneously pulling out their credit cards till they get carpal tunnel syndrome! The sites will be announced in the coming weeks.
We’ve also added some cutting-edge affiliate tools like free hosted sites and RSS feeds, free hosted sites, and all of the other unique tools that will make our sites easy to promote!
Both Freshchecks and OCCash are very pleased with how this has worked out. If you have questions or comments please contact jay@occash.com.
All outstanding Freshchecks payouts have been mailed 9/29 by OCCash.
Sign up here: www.freshchecks.com
